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About Everything Wiki » Sexology » 12 rules of casual sex that will save you from disappointment

12 rules of casual sex that will save you from disappointment

02 May 2023, 12:52, parser
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It doesn't matter why you decided to do this: to distract yourself from thoughts about a recent breakup or out of love for sex. The main thing is to remember a few rules.

1. Find a suitable pair

It is clear that you will not live together and not raise children. But still, a partner for sex should be at least physically pleasant to you and want the same as you. It's definitely not worth dragging friends, colleagues, and even more exes to bed. And in general, it is better not to attract people with whom you often have to cross paths in real life. To search, you have the entire Internet at your disposal with its sites and dating apps.

2. Mark the boundaries in advance

It is necessary that both of you clearly understand that your meetings are only for the sake of sex and there will be no plot development towards getting to know your parents. If possible, discuss the details, expectations and preferences before the meeting, so that there are no unpleasant surprises.

3. Tune in to the fact that everything will be pleasant and not serious

No reflection and emotions. It's just an adventure, and your goal is an orgasm, not heartache. If deep down you still expect that casual sex can develop into a great feeling, then it's better not to start.

4. Take a responsible approach to protection

It is important that the date goes not only without psychological, but also without physical consequences. Therefore, do not count on anyone, but stock up on condoms yourself. And refuse offers to do without them.

5. Talk about abstract topics

If you have time to talk at all before or after sex, do not switch to personal topics. Do not share information about your family or loved ones. Food, TV shows, sports, weather... you never know what a man and a woman can chat about?

6. Don't give up on romance

There is little joy in mechanical sex without emotions, so do not deprive yourself of a preliminary warming-up flirtation. Your date can be very romantic, and you will give each other a lot of tenderness and pleasant feelings. Just be aware that this is not real. You are caught in a plot that is about to end.

7. Be yourself, but a little different

One of the advantages of casual bonding is that you don't have to appear better than you are. It makes no sense to go out of your way to make an indelible impression. But it's very possible to play someone else. If you want to try a new role, to prove yourself differently than in ordinary life, this is the most suitable case.

8. Do not allow insults

Being yourself does not mean being rude, humiliating, insulting, and even more so causing pain. Do not allow rude treatment either to yourself or to the other party. Unless, of course, you have agreed in advance to bring elements of BDSM into your date.

9. Don't stay overnight

Casual sex with an interesting stranger or a beautiful stranger can be exciting. But waking up in the morning with a stranger or seeing a strange lady in a negligee in your kitchen is already a dubious pleasure.

It is better, of course, to discuss the time of the overnight stay in advance. But the unspoken rule is this: if you are visiting, do not run away as soon as everything is over, but do not stay until morning. If you are the owner, don't call a taxi right away, let me catch my breath. But do not insist on sleeping together with hugs.

10. Less texting

It is not necessary to look for a new partner for sex every time, if the previous one completely satisfied you. But in order not to create the illusion of a close relationship, limit the correspondence between dates to a minimum.

11. Stop resentment

After casual sex, you owe nothing to anyone. If the other party makes claims or wants something more from you, just remind them of the rules of the game and that nothing has changed for you. That's enough. Do not clarify the relationship. Moreover, they are not. But if both of you (!) changed your mind and decided that there is a relationship after all, then this is another conversation.

12. Don't blame yourself

Unaccustomed to a night of casual love, it may well end with reflections on one's own depravity. Here it remains only to inspire yourself with the following obvious truth: there is nothing wrong with the fact that two adults met for consensual sex. And period.

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