It is very difficult to refuse an offered job, especially if it pays well. And even if previous experience has clearly shown you that you should not get involved with this — too much emotional, time and energy costs. And every time you tell yourself that you can't refuse, because this is such an interesting project that will bring not only money, but also universal recognition! And 2 days after the start, you scold yourself for getting involved in this case again.
The desire to sit on many chairs at the same time, as well as to catch two birds with one stone (or even more), especially often occurs among the young, talented and ambitious. But sometimes it's worth thinking, weighing everything « for » and « against », letting go and saying «No ». So that sleep was healthier, and there were forces to enjoy the fruits of their labors, and there was an opportunity to be proud of their work.
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And again, like a dream in my hand, I came across an interesting guest post on Zenhabits from Michael Bungay Stanier, a senior partner at Box of Crayons, which helps people do less Good Things and more Great Ones. This time the topic of the desire to sit on two chairs at the same time is touched upon. When it's worth thinking about and saying no to another financially attractive job offer. Do we know how to prioritize, highlight the main thing and create really great things?
Michael remembers his boss at his first job, who tried to get into every project that was somehow interesting to him. After a while, he himself became the same and became more like a squirrel in a wheel than a successful person who can freely manage his time and prioritize according to his views.
Is a job that can be said «like a squirrel in a wheel» such an attractive one? How long will you be able to maintain this frenzied pace without harming both your physical and psychological health? And where is the guarantee that you are doing really worthwhile things?
The only thing you can do in this case is to separate the main from the secondary and postpone the secondary altogether. And then see if the end of the world has come because you decided to give up this job.
Is the world still in place? So you made the right decision both for yourself and for others. But do you have the guts to break the chains that your own consciousness has forged?
Are you jumping for joy because you have added another 100 new friends on the social network and 100 new followers on Twitter? But how long does this achievement please you? Who are all these people? Do you feel warmer, more comfortable in communicating with them, as if you are going to a friendly get-together with loved ones? And how much time does it take you to communicate with a virtual circle of friends? How real are these people to you and are they worth the time spent?
The more popular you become, the more people want to be friends with you, read your news, comment and ... get answers to their comments. Gradually, online communication begins to take a lot of time and effort. That's when you start to get annoyed by the need to constantly be in touch, be active, attend all seminars and conferences, then you should put on the brakes and think well about where you have come and where to go next.Maybe it's worth looking at it from a slightly different angle? Look not wider, but deeper. And add to your busy schedule a call to a real friend. When was the last time you met your friends, heard their voice and saw their smiles? What is more important to you?
We are constantly torn between the desire to have a decent amount on our card stably twice a month, but at the same time working clearly not at the job of our dreams, and between what really makes your eyes burn, but which barely covers your rent costs.
The clock is ticking and your calendar won't lie to you and will show you exactly what you spent your precious time on — day, week, month... year?
A good job just allows you to live comfortably physically and relatively comfortably mentally, and a really Great Thing makes you on the edge and realize that you are doing something that changes the world for the better.
Could you trade money and comfort (and a standard job) for something really important?
When we plan, we look into the future. Of course, plans help us set certain goals and somehow track their implementation. But, besides that, they also take away our time and attention from the here and now. No one is calling for a complete abandonment of planning. In one of the posts I have already touched on the topic of life without plans for at least some time based on Leo Babauta's post. The main thing behind the plans is not to miss new opportunities that were not included in these very plans.
In addition, when you make a plan for something important and live it, you can miss a lot. Michael gives a wonderful example that while he was waiting for the publication of his book, he did not notice how the summer flew by. He did not feel it, there were no bright moments left in his memory that could be recalled in the winter.
Our life (which we have only one) can fly by behind plans and expectations, and we won't notice it. We need to understand that plans have a price to pay.
Does your price correspond to real opportunities and desires? How much are you willing to pay?
I don't want to say that Michael is 100% right on all points. But he asks the right questions, which are worth thinking about at least occasionally, so as not to lose the reference point and remember what our life and our talents are given to us for.
And what do you think?
